


She don't gotta know

by Footballsucks



Category: Football RPF
Genre: And this is an actual goodbye to neymessi, F/M, I mean i just wrote it 5 mins ago, Its been nice, M/M, Well bittersweet you could say, angsty, no happy ending, this is wow
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-22
Updated: 2018-07-22
Packaged: 2019-06-14 06:08:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,461
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15382359
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Footballsucks/pseuds/Footballsucks
Summary: Neymar always feels sick after he kisses the man





	She don't gotta know

**Author's Note:**

> Hello this is my official goodbye to this ship and once again its based off a song ' I dont wanna waste my time' joji

"I don't wanna waste my time if I can't be by your side  
You really shouldn't think about God if she can't see where you hide  
We don't gotta talk about nothing nice if you wanna come down"

" Fuck Leo faster ah I'm gonna-"  
Neymar whinned out as he rided out his orgasm bouncing on Messi's dick. The older man looking so ready to just come along with the younger man.

 

" So good Neymar you're so good"  
Leo panted out as he grasped viciously at Neymar's hips then emptying himself. He nipped at Neymar's neck with the last bit of energy he had before falling back into the bed. 

Neymar slowly removed himself off Leo's dick and rolled over so he could lay next to the other man. He knew Leo was starring at him and yet he didn't stay a word. He's dirty he promises himself and He's dirty again.

He didn't think he could possibly stomach even briefly looking at Leo. How can you look at a person you've just committed a sin with? 

Leo tugged on his arm and Neymar squeezed his eyes shut not daring to open them. He didn't want to look at the cum nor did he want to see the man and he did not want to see the room. He just wanted to imagine he had gotten off at home and he had just not committed this sin. 

" You don't have to worry"  
Leo finally said after a brief few minutes of silence. Neymar knew exactly what he was talking about Leo always did know what Neymar was thinking after all. Neymar felt himself get queasy and he shook his head simply. 

" She doesn't know nor does she gotta know "  
And just like that it all triggered Neymar a tad too much as he flung himself off the ran to the bathroom. An all too common ritual that happens almost every week. 

Neymar wishes he could say he doesn't have Lionel Messi's bathroom pattern floor memorized but he does. 

Neymar wishes he could say that he doesn't know the exact color of Lionel Messi's bathroom walls. 

Neymar wishes he could say that he hasn't had the image of Lionel Messi's shower digged into his mind. 

Oh he wishes so much. 

He lunches forth and throws up whatever he had eaten that day in the toilet.

He doesn't move for the longest time he just sits there and memorize the different type of shampoo bottles in the sink. 

After an intense 10 minutes he washes his hands anything to wash the dirtiness away. It doesn't work it's still there. He scubs harder. Its still there. He throws his hands up in frustration. He's so dirty. 

He walks out of the bathroom twelve minutes later. Leo is still wide awake he says nothing as Neymar slides back into bed with him. No words are spoken. 

Leo had gotten used to it

*****************************

"But she don't gotta know 'bout nothing  
But she don't gotta know..."

Neymar wakes up and Leo isn't there. No surprise there he can briefly smell Leo on the pillows and with that he gets up. He quietly walks to the living room and is greeted with framed pictures. Again. 

They seem to tease and mock him but most importantly it feels as if they judge him.

Family that's Leo's family. 

He doesn't feel bad when he reaches for one particular picture and slams it on the floor. 

He doesn't feel bad when he cries for a while just starring at the pictures. So innocent, so unknowing.

He doesn't feel bad when he heads back to bed and relives the night before. 

He doesn't feel bad at all 

****************************

"And if the stars collide, will she relieve my soul?  
And when we feel alive I know she'll let me go  
When you read my lips, I know you feel all cold  
But I promise you my heart is made of gold"

How can she not know? How can they not know? 

Leo is practically all over him and it makes Neymar want to punch him for even coming close to him when they are around. 

But as Leo kisses Neymar's cheek affectionately he can see the lights go on in Leo's eyes. 

Its been so long since he's seen the man truly happy. So long and yet here he was giving him 'friendly' kisses on the cheek and bragging about Neymar. He's happier now that Neymar came with him. And Neymar feels himself ache. 

He doesn't say anything when he sees that she's watching them instead Leo sees and he puts on his biggest smile and gives Neymar a friendly pat on the shoulder to bring him closer. 

How can she not know?

They managed to get away from everything and everyone's pestering eyes. Neymar sits on the bed and doesn't move from there while Leo watches him carefully. 

" She'll let me go when its time"  
Neymar says nothing at Leo's words he doesn't know her but oh god he wished he had the courage to. 

She doesn't deserve this and Neymar doesn't deserve this. 

He doesn't blame God if he decides to cut Neymar's life a bit shorter. 

He has that feeling again the queasy feeling and he can't help but look up at Leo. 

Leo looked straight back at him with so much honesty and love in his eyes. 

Neymar throws up.

They leave the party early. 

Neymar can't look at himself in the mirror anymore.

*********************

"I don't wanna waste my time if I can't make you decide  
You're only on my mind when I need you  
I don't need to know about what you do when the sun goes down  
Cause I don't gotta know about nothing  
Cause I don't gotta know..." 

Neymar was tired oh so tired he watched the man who was 'in love' with him dance with her. 

What was he even doing? Catering for a man who would never even dare make a chnage for him. Why did he even bother to hurt himself like this? 

He can't handle anymore of this as he grabs his jacket and leaves. He pushes pass local drunks and other guests. A hand roughly grasp him and he's spun around to face the man.

" Where are you going?"  
Leo asked his eyebrows raised at the other man. How he had managed to lose his wife and catch up with Neymar? He didn't know

" Home"  
Neymar said simply hoping that would make Leo let go. Usually when he would say that Leo would let him go. But this is different and both men know it.

" Oh, I'll go too"  
Leo said already ready to leave and go along with Neymar.

" No"  
Neymar said simply his eyes shutting out of reflex. His stomach turns again and he knows it won't end well. But he wants peace.

" What?"  
He doesn't have to open his eyes to know the other man has his head cocked to the side and his tounge slightly sticking out. He knows Leo he knows his reactions.

" No, you can't go home with me "  
Neymar finally said biting down on his lips he could feel tears already. Dammit why is this so hard to do?

" Ney, Why not?"  
He heard Leo's confused little voice and knew it would haunt him for a while. But it wouldn't haunt him as much as her voice. 

" Turn around Leo "  
And with that he finally opened his eyes and he nodded towards Leo's house. Leo knew exactly what he meant how could he not?

" That's why"  
Neymar finally said as he cleaned a rough tear of his cheek and sighed. He didn't want this he never would have wanted this.

" You can't leave me"  
Leo says desperately as he turns back around and clings to Neymar. So forcefully that Neymar almost falls back and says ' its okay let's go home.'

" I never said that"  
Neymar went on but both men knew what he was implying. 

" Then why does it feel like you did?"  
Leo went on with tears in his eyes know as he was just now realizing the situation.

" Maybe its time for you to rejoin them"  
Neymar said as he harshly removed Leo from him. He didn't want to make this even worse.

" I can't, I can't anymore"  
Leo cried out as his eyes turned big and his lips quivered on the verge of letting out a full on sob. 

" Leo, you have too" 

" I can't without you" 

" it's okay I'll be fine and you'll be fine" 

" Neymar?" 

" Yes Leo?" 

" Remember I love you and I always will even in her arms" 

" I know Leo I know" 

" I wish I could have made you stay" 

" And i wish i could have made you leave"


End file.
